The Chick-Fil-A Incident

Fans of the blog have been clamoring to know more details about the Chick-Fil-A incident mentioned in the previous post. (Okay...it was just one faithful reader.) So Schwendy, (and that nickname is also a long story which I will elaborate on later this week) this is for you. Happy Birthday! Really...her birthday is today.
So Phil and I were at a local mall getting something to eat at the food court. When at a food court in a mall, usually you'll find me at the Chick-Fil-A counter. There's just something about those waffle fries and nobody, I mean nobody makes a better chicken sandwich. But I digress...
Phil headed over to either pizza place or the chinese place. I can't remember and it actually doesn't make much of a difference but I want to keep my reputation in tact for making a short story long.
As I was standing in line I began to feel really warm. My stomach also began to feel like eating wasn't such a good idea. Things started to blacken a bit so when I reached the counter I leaned over on it to keep myself standing. Now at this point, Phil later related to me that he had turned around to see where I was and saw me slump over to the side and keep going until I hit the floor landing flat on my back.
Now of course, he lost 10 years of his life watching the whole incident. The love of his life, the absolute center of his everything lying motionless on the cold, hard floor of the food court. (A flair for the dramatic...hmm, perhaps.)
And how does a crash test dummy enter into the picture, one might ask? Well, it just so happens that it was some kind of Safety Week being held at the mall. There were dozens of display booths lining the center of the mall. And lucky me, one that housed a couple of guys dressed up as crash test dummies just happened to be parked next to the food court.
So I came to, after a few minutes, with Phil, two guys dressed like crash test dummies, and a police officer (who happened to be manning the next booth over) all looming over me reminiscent of a scene from a movie. And yes, one feels a bit disorientated when waking up from fainting. Even more disorientated when staring into the face of a crash test dummy peering over you while hearing someone off in the distance saying, "You want ketchup or mayonaise with that?"
So there you have it...the Chick-Fil-A incident. All ended well, I'm happy to report. Never did find out why I took the dive. Just hungry and hot, I suppose. Which is why to this day, even if in the middle of winter, I never wear a turtleneck and sweater together while at the mall.