I've never gotten bumper stickers. Why in the world would you want to paste something on the outside of your car? As if your car didn't depreciate enough when you drove it off the car lot, you're going to plaster the back of it with pithy little sayings that tell the world more about you than really should be told?
Yesterday I was driving along the idyllic streets of Langhorne when I started reading the one on the car in front of me. (Here's where I admit they do help pass the time when waiting at a red light.) But this one...did I just read what I thought I read?
No lie...here's what I read, "The reason I'm going so fast is that I really need to get home to poop." Um...what? Who on earth would put that on the back of your car? Did it have a little pile of poop next to the sentence? Yes...yes it did. And the kicker? The little metal thing that holds your license plate in place read, "The Holy Bible is the literal Word of God." Truly.
Do I believe that the Bible is the literal word of God? You bet. Would I put a bumper sticker referring to bowel movements next to said statement of my personal theology? Uh...no. Just wondering what would make someone do that.
Of course not all bumper stickers make me scratch my head. Some are down right funny. And the funniest one I've ever seen? A few years ago I was driving back to work from my lunch break (why yes...I probably was coming back from McDonald's) and I was stopped at a red light behind this huge pickup truck. The kind of truck you usually find on the rural streets of good ol' Ohio...not necessarily the East Coast. Not a slam on Ohio...just stating fact. Anyway, I see proudly displayed the round sticker of the NRA. And right next to it? A sticker for PETA. Yeah...me too. Just didn't go together. I remember thinking how in the world would an NRA member also be a member of PETA?
As I crept slowly closer to the back of the truck, I saw that PETA did not in fact, stand for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. On this particular jacked-up pick-up truck PETA stood for People for the Eating of Tasty Animals. Still makes me laugh, years later.
How about you? What's the funniest bumper sticker you've ever seen?
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Don't laugh too hard. I actually bought the "poop" bumper sticker. Yep. Paid actual money for that. I bought it for my brother-in-law for his birthday last year. (Definitely a type of sticker you'd see more of in this red-neck-of-the-woods!)There is an ongoing family joke that he is always having an "emergency" and speeding to the nearest bathroom. So, I found that endearing little sentiment for him. Goes to show that there is a bumper sticker out there somewhere for everyone. Let's see...for you...how about "McDonalds or bust!"? :)(I could think of others for you, but I'll be nice! :)
ReplyDeleteI saw one just yesterday on my way to school that said, "Don't be a pinhead." What the heck is that supposed to mean? AND it was positioned right next to the Jesus fish.
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