Seriously...Who Buys This Stuff? Sky Mall Edition

I'm back from London. Such a great weekend! I'm holding off a bit on posting about the actual trip because I need to see if Phil can email me the pictures I took (and left on the card in the camera that's still in London) to add to the post. A sneak peak...a musical, some seriously old stuff, a big stone, two fantastic tours, and making my way on the tube. More to follow.

But today...some musings regarding the Sky Mall magazine. I've spent quite a bit of time on planes in the past two years and always pick up a Sky Mall to pass some time. Listed below is my list I call, "Seriously...Who Buys This Stuff?"

1.Truck Antlers
Weatherproof molded plastic antlers that you attach to the front seat side windows. Really...why would anyone do that?

2. The Indoor Dog Restroom
It's a mat and tray system that lets your dog pee on the mat which allows liquid to drain into the tray below it. Who wants to pick up a 2 feet square tray and carry it over to your toilet to empty? It holds up to two gallons. Uh...eew.

3. The World's Largest Crossword Puzzle
It holds the Guiness World's Record for it's size. It's 7 feet by 7 feet and has 28,000 clues for over 91,000 squares. I'm all for a good crossword now and then, but that's ridiculous. Who clears wall space to hang a 7 ft by 7 ft crossword puzzle?

4. The Talking Timepiece
It's a watch with a "pleasant female voice" that with the push of one button repeats the current time. Maybe I'm not getting it, but can't you just look down and see the time on the watch? Although "you can supplant the female voice with a built-in rooster call". Interesting...

5. The Voice Activated R2D2
It's an actual little robot (a bit over a foot tall) that moves around from room to room. It even "dances while playing the famed cantina music". What every household in America truly needs for a mere $170.00.

6. The Hidden Litter Box
Made to look like a clay pot that holds an artifical plant. You can turn the hole that the cat walks through to face the back of your living room. I think if your cat's litter box is in your living room, there are more serious issues at hand here.

7. Your Passenger Seat Office
A workstation that straps to your car's passenger seat and "provides a non-slip writing surface, hanging file section and space for your laptop and printer." The picture shows a lady with one hand typing on her laptop, the other grabbing a file folder out of the hanging file section, and her cell phone tucked under her cheek while looking at the page coming out of her printer. Again...call me crazy but aren't you actually supposed to be driving when you're behind the wheel of your car?

8. Peanut Butter Maker
"Fill the hopper with your favorite nuts and grind them into smooth or chunky butter." I got to say the picture of carmel-colored goo flowing into the vat below is quite nasty looking.

and finally...my personal favorites...

9. Decorative statues for your backyard garden
"Treebeard Ent with Mystical Orb"- a two foot tall sculpted tree complete with eyes, nose and mouth with limbs holding out a white ball
"Basho the Sumo Wrestler"- also comes with 27" diameter piece of glass to use for a lovely table for your next garden party
"The Dragon of Falkenberg Castle Moat"- 2 foot long dragon complete with scales, wings and a treacherous tail. "Your neighbors will steer clear when they see this intricately sculpted dragon"...yeah, no kidding...you have a dragon statue in your backyard.
"Bigfoot, the Garden Yeti"- with his characteristically huge feet, "you will have your neighbors doing a double-take as they admire your creative home or garden style!" I don't think that's why your neighbors are doing the double-take. You have a statue of Bigfoot in your back yard.

So there you have it. London to soon follow.